Noted Dough Boy Dies

Veteran Pillsbury spokesman Pop N. Fresh died Wednesday
of a severe yeast infection He was 71. He was buried Friday
in one of the biggest funerals in years. Dozens of
celebrities turned out including Mrs. Butterworth, the
California Raisins, Hungry Jack, Betty Crocker, and the
Hostess Twinkies The graveside was piled high with flours,
as longtime friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy,
describing Fresh as a man who "never knew he was kneaded".

Fresh rose quickly in show business, but his later life was
filled with turnovers. He was not considered a smart cookie,
and wasted much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Still,
even as a crusty old man, he was a roll model to millions.
Fresh is survived by his second wife. They had two children,
and... one in the oven.