By following the simple advice I read in an article, I have finally
found inner peace ...

The article read:

"The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you've
started."

So I looked around the house to see all the things that I started and
hadn't finished ... and before coming to work this morning I finished
off a bottle of red wine, a bottle of white, the Bailey's, Kahlua and 
Tia Maria, my Prozac, a couple of valiums, three cigars and a box of
chocolates.

You have no idea how freakin good I feel!