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Today's stories [6.23.17]

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The Wipe-Up

Find a friend who likes to show off or prove himself all the time, then 
tell them you have a test of speed and reaction for them and that you 
think you are faster. what you do is pour some water on a tile floor (a 
puddle about 10" wide works well), grab a fork and a towel and tell them 
you think you can wipe up the water before they poke you with the fork. 
Also tell them that you are really quick and to make it fair they need to 
sit on the floor near the puddle with their legs spread to the sides so 
the puddle is between their knees. Here is where the fun stuff comes in, 
tell them to go on three, then start counting (all the while you are 
holding the towel) one - two - th....grab their feet and drag their ass 
through it

Sent by Keith

1. 




My brother John has a best friend also named John
who went to the same school as him.  One day after
school they both got a ride home from a friends mom.
As they got in the car, she asked them both their
names.  They both said John (as it was thier names)
to which she replied "Oh! Are you brothers?"

Sent by Sho

2. 




NOTE:   I don't know how anyone could write this with a straight face! 
This was an actual memo sent at an unnamed computer company to its 
employees.  It went to all the company's field engineers, and it was in 
regard to a computer peripheral problem. The author of this memo was
quite serious; the engineers rolled on the floor!  (Especially note the 
last sentence!) 

INSTRUCTIONS FOR REPLACING MOUSE BALLS 

Mouse balls are now available as FRU (Field Replacement Unit). 
Therefore, if a mouse fails to operate or should it perform erratically, 
it may need a ball replacement. Because of the delicate nature of this
procedure, replacement of mouse balls should only be attempted by  
properly trained personnel. 

Before proceeding, determine the type of mouse balls by examining the 
underside of the mouse. Domestic balls will be larger and harder than 
foreign balls. 

Ball removal procedures differ depending upon the manufacturer of the 
mouse. Foreign balls can be replaced using the pop-off method.  Domestic 
balls are replaced by using the twist-off method. 

Mouse balls are not usually static-sensitive.  However, excessive handling 
can result in sudden discharge. 

Upon completion of ball replacement, the mouse may be used immediately. 
It is recommended each replacer have a pair of spare balls for maintaining 
optimum customer satisfaction.  Any customer missing his balls should 
contact the local personnel in charge of removing and replacing these 
necessary items.

3. 



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