"My purpose here is to clearly demonstrate to all concerned that you are
 indeed insane; so that all doctors, policemen and other persons of
 authority will be shown to their professional satisfaction the truth of
 my statements. Please, do not change colour while I am talking to you."
                        -- MC 900ft Jesus, "Tiptoe through the Inferno"

"... we show you lions (we borrowed from a zoo) savagely stalk and attack
 their prey! (that we tied down ahead of time to ensure a good camera
 angle)..."
                        -- Jello Biafra, "Mild Kingdom"

"... this is telling us that our important words are 'smelt', 'bud',
 'brier' and 'nard'..."
                        -- Peter Kelsall (we don't know what he's on either)

"I think I have it. A man talking sense to himself is no madder than a man
 talking nonsense not to himself."
"Or just as mad."
"Or just as mad."
"And he does both."
"So there you are."
"Stark raving sane."
                        -- Guildenstern, Rosencrantz,
                                "Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead"

"It's a small world, unless you have to clean it."
                        -- from the cover of Snog's "Dear Valued Customer"
                                album