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	"Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain." - Lily Tomlin

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	"Ever notice how it's a penny for your thoughts, yet you put in your two cents? Someone is making a penny on the deal." - Steven Wright

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	When I'm good, I'm very good. But when I'm bad I'm better. - Mae West

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	It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education. - Albert Einstein

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	We should restore the practice of dueling. It might improve manners around here. - Edward Abbey

"Now I understand why the post office puts up wanted posters for robbers. 
It just goes to prove the old saying that it takes one to know one"

                                        - Mary Tyler Moore

"I waited and waited, and when no message came, I knew it must have been 
from you. " 

                                        - Ashleigh Brilliant

Bare necessities of life: Food, clothing, and a blonde.

                                    - W. C. Fields

Being rich is better than being poor, if only for financial reasons.

                                - Woody Allen from Without Feathers

I look just like the girl next door... if you happen to live next door to 
an amusement park. 

                                          - Dolly Parton