3125 Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to
calm myself down. I'll go over to the person's house and ring the
doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you know what
I've left on the porch? A jack-o-lantern with a knife stuck in the side
of its head with a note that says "You." After that, I usually
feel a lot better, and no harm done
-- Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe
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3126 Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to
calm myself down. I'll go over to the person's house and ring the
doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you know what
I've left on the porch? A jack-o-lantern with a knife stuck in the side
of its head with a note that says "You." After that, I usually
feel a lot better, and no harm done
-- Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe
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3127 My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right
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3128 My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right
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3129 Lisa: Why are you dedicating your life to blasphemy?
Homer: Don't worry, sweetheart. If I'm wrong, I'll recant on my deathbed.
-- Always have a backup plan, ``Homer the Heretic''
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3130 Lisa: Why are you dedicating your life to blasphemy?
Homer: Don't worry, sweetheart. If I'm wrong, I'll recant on my deathbed.
-- Always have a backup plan, ``Homer the Heretic''
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3131 Boy, everyone is stupid except me.
-- Homer Simpson, ``Homer the Heretic''
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3132 Boy, everyone is stupid except me.
-- Homer Simpson, ``Homer the Heretic''
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3133 Don't worry, Homer. Nine out of ten religions fail in their first year.
-- God, ``Homer the Heretic''
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3134 Don't worry, Homer. Nine out of ten religions fail in their first year.
-- God, ``Homer the Heretic''
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3135 to alchohol, the cause of and solution to all life's problems
-- Homer Simpson
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3136 to alchohol, the cause of and solution to all life's problems
-- Homer Simpson
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3137
"Here lies... Walt Whitman. Aaargh! Damn you Walt Whitman!
I... hate... you... Walt...freakin... Whitman, leaves of
grass my ass!"
Homer Simpson
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3138
"Here lies... Walt Whitman. Aaargh! Damn you Walt Whitman!
I... hate... you... Walt...freakin... Whitman, leaves of
grass my ass!"
Homer Simpson
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3139 There may be some things better than sex and some things may be worse,
but there is nothing exactly like it.
- W. C. Fields
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3140 There may be some things better than sex and some things may be worse,
but there is nothing exactly like it.
- W. C. Fields
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