Jokes2Go Daily Humor

Today's Joke

Sun, 12 Feb 2012 00:05:02 GMT

This guy goes into a restaurant. He's a little more than strung out from
lack of sleep. The waiter asked for his order. Trying to be funny he asked
the waiter for a hit of his best heroin. Struggling to keep a straight
face.
The waiter says,"I'm sorry sir, we're all out".
"In that case bring me an espresso and a syringe", our friend says.
Being a restaurant that prided itself on good service the waiter brought
him an espresso, with a straw of course.

Today's Story

Sun, 12 Feb 2012 00:05:02 GMT

I was out walking with my then 4-year-old daughter. She picked up something
off the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I asked her not to do that.

"Why?"

"Because it's been laying outside and it is dirty and probably has germs."

At this point, she looked at me with total admiration and asked, "Wow! How
do you know all this stuff?"

Uh, I was thinking quickly, "...all moms knows this stuff. Um, it's on the
Mommy Test. You have to know it, or they don't let you be a Mommy."

We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but she was evidently
pondering this new information.

OH...I get It!" she beamed, "So if you flunk, you have to be the Daddy."

Today's Poem

Sun, 12 Feb 2012 00:05:02 GMT

There was a young maiden of Siam
Who said to her lover, young Kiam,
"If you kiss me, of course,
You will have to use force,-
But god knows you are stronger that I am."

Today's Quote

Sun, 12 Feb 2012 00:05:02 GMT

Seen on a bumper sticker...

Your kid may be an honor student but you're still an idiot!