Jokes2Go Daily Humor

Today's Joke

2009-07-02T00:05:01Z

Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson are hiking. They hiked all day long and
then, having gotten tired, unpacked and quickly retired.

Holmes wakes up deep into the night, wakes Watson and says "Watson, do you
see the bright stars and do you notice how clear the sky is? What can you
deduce from it?"

Watson yawns and tries to play the game. "Well, this clearly tells us the
weather tomorrow is going to be dry and sunny."

"No, my friend. It's much simpler than that. Someone has stolen our tent."

Today's Story

2009-07-02T00:05:01Z

It was the day before my eighteenth birthday. I was living at home, but my
parents had gone out for the evening, so I invited my girlfriend over for a
romantic night alone. As we lay in bed after making love, we heard the
telephone ring downstairs. I suggested to my girlfriend that I give her a
nude piggyback ride to the phone. Since we didn't want to miss the call, we
didn't have time to get dressed. When we got to the bottom of the stairs,
the lights suddenly came on and a whole crowd of people yelled, "SURPRISE!"
My entire family: aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins and all my friends
Were standing there. My girlfriend and I were frozen embarrassment for
What seemed like an eternity. Since then, no one in my family has planned
a surprise party again.

Today's Poem

2009-07-02T00:05:01Z

A horny old broad from Point Breeze Once said to her lover, "Oh please! You'd enhance my bliss If you'd play more with this And pay less attention to these."

Today's Quote

2009-07-02T00:05:01Z

"You have to take a lighter approach now. Jumping up on a table in a busy restaurant, swinging from the ceiling fans, and screaming, 'YOU'RE ALL GONNA BURN IN HELL,' just scares people away." -- Interview with Steven Forker, on his future role as the Third Coming of Christ, in Precious the Cow Magazine (from the sig of Lt. Wilkes)