The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love
to a very attractive young woman.  And she was somewhat upset. 

'You are a disrespectful pig!' she cried. 'How dare you do this to me -- 
a faithful wife, the mother of your children!   I'm leaving you. I want a 
divorce right away!'

And the husband replied, 'Hang on just a minute love so at least I can tell
you what happened.' 

'Fine, go ahead,' she sobbed,' but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!'

And the husband began -- 

'Well, I was getting into the car to drive home, and this young lady here
asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took
pity on her and let her into the car.   I noticed that she was very thin,
not well dressed and very dirty.  She told me that she hadn't eaten for
three days.   So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the
enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because
you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in
moments.   Since she needed a good clean-up, I suggested a shower, and
while she was doing that, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of
holes, so I threw them away.   Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the
designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't wear because
you say they are too tight.   I also gave her the underwear that was your
anniversary present, which you don't wear because I don't have good taste.
  I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't
wear just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the
expensive boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a pair the
same.'   
 
The husband took a quick breath and continued - 
'She was so grateful for my understanding and help that as I walked her to
the door, she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said, 'Please ... Do
you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?'