Cinderella was all set to go to the huge ball, but she was having a severe 
case of PMS. She was crabby and pissy and moody and generally not in the 
partying spirit. Well, her fairy-godmother again came to her rescue by 
providing Cinderella with a magic tampon. The fairy-godmother said, "Put 
this in and your PMS will be gone. Just remember, you have to be home by 
the stroke of midnight or the magic tampon will turn into a pumpkin and 
that is gonna be painful as hell to get out."
So, off Cinderella went to the ball in a great mood ready to dance the 
night away. Midnight comes and goes, however, and no Cinderella. Her 
fairy-godmother is worried to death. 1..2...3am and no sign of Cinderella. 
Finally she comes home at 4am. The fairy-godmother was distraught. "What 
on earth happened to you?" she said. "What about the magic tampon. I've 
been worried sick about you."
"Oh don't worry," Cinderella replied. "I met this really great guy named 
Peter-Peter."