There were these three morticians talking about their greatest feats.
The first one says, "I had this soldier who stepped on a land mine.
Took me three days to get him ready for an open casket funeral!!"
The next guy says, "oh yeah? I had this construction worker fall
15 stories, then he got run over by a steam roller, but I had him
ready for an open casket funeral in two days!!!" The third guy sulks
in the corner, "man. both y'all got me beat. I had this lady parachutist
who landed on the empire state building. it took me four days just to get
the grin off her face."