One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God, "Lord, I
have a problem!"
"What's the problem, Eve?"
"Lord, I know you've created me and have provided this beautiful
garden and all of these wonderful animals, and that hilarious
comedy snake, but I'm just not happy."
"Why is that, Eve?" came the reply from above.
"Lord, I am lonely. And I'm sick to death of apples."
"Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man
"What's a 'man', Lord?"
"This man will be a flawed creature, with aggressive tendencies,
an enormous ego and an inability to empathize or listen to you
properly. All in all, he'll give you a hard time. But, he'll be bigger
and faster and more muscular than you. He'll be really good at
fighting and kicking a ball about and hunting fleet-footed
ruminants, and not altogether bad in the sack."
"Sounds great," says Eve, with an ironically raised eyebrow.
"Yeah, well. He's better than a poke in the eye with a burnt
stick. But, you can have him on one condition."
"What's that, Lord?"
"You'll have to let him believe that I made him first."