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If you're a sports fan, you've probably marveled at a variety of accomplishments, such as Phil Jackson's nine NBA titles, Tiger Woods' nine major championships, and David Beckham's nine stunning tattoos. But if you really want to be impressed, check out what Percy and Florence Arrowsmith have accomplished: 80 years of marriage. That's a tremendous feat, especially when most Hollywood marriages crumble before the ink has dried on the prenuptial agreement. As one actor said, "Eighty years of marriage! Wow! I'd be happy with 80 days of marriage." As reported by the Associated Press, the Arrowsmiths, of Hereford, England, tied the knot on June 1, 1925. It was such a long time ago that their wedding picture was etched on the wall of a cave. Florence wore lambskin; Percy a fig leaf. He also had a bow, though he left his arrows at home. Percy, now 105, and Florence, 100, have set two Guinness World Records: Longest marriage for a living couple and oldest aggregate age for a married couple. As one athlete said, "That's amazing. Two world records and they've never even touched steroids." I can't even imagine being married 80 years. I got married in my mid-30s, somewhat late in life, so I'd be happy to enjoy 40 years of marital bliss, preferably with the same woman. According to the AP article, the Arrowsmiths say the key to a long marriage is to never take an argument to bed. They always kiss and hold hands before falling asleep. I've heard many old couples say this, but it's hard to put into practice, at least for me. I've often wanted to hold my wife's hand after an argument, but our bed and couch are too far apart. Perhaps I need a nine-foot pole. I've been married only five years, but I've already learned some keys to a lasting marriage:
Raj: "Whoops. Looks like I forgot to pay our electric bill again. We just got a shut-off notice." Rani: "Oh, Raj! I'm really sorry you're so careless. And I'm also sorry I married you."
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An Arrowsmith record we can dance to