this.document.write('I was on a Reno Air flight from San Jose to Las Vegas and the plane was taxiing to take off. The flight attendant came on the intercom and said, "For those of you currently reading our in-
flight magazine, please place it back in the seat pocket in front of you, as it is for IN-FLIGHT only." Later on, once we were airborne, he came back and said, "If you\'re sitting on the right side of the plane, look out the window and you will see big, white, fluffy clouds. If you\'re on the left side of the plane, you\'ll see ... big, white, fluffy clouds. Directly beneath you is...your luggage."

Once we landed, he told us to remain seated with our seatbelts fastened until we were fully stopped at the gate. Just as we were about to reach the gate, he said, "Don\'t even think about it!" He also said, "We have a man onboard who is celebrating his 100th birthday and this is his first flight! It is also probably his last flight." (\'Boo\'s\' from the passengers.) "So please, when you walk by the cockpit , wish the pilot a happy birthday."');