| Archives | Lists | Random | Register | Tell Joke | Links | About |
Pokern |
Vote for the joke that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes.
Three Things Women Can Do That Men Can't: 1. Bleed for a week and not die. 2. Give milk without eating grass 3. Bury an eight inch bone faster than any dog!
Send this joke to a friend
1
An old man and his son had a one-horse farm where they barely made a living. Then, one day, the son hit the lottery and won $50,000. The young man rushed into town, collected his money, then hurried back home. He ran across the field, told his father the news, and handed the older man a $50 bill. The father looked at the money for a moment and then said, "Son, you know I've always been careful with what little money we had. I didn't spend it on whiskey or women. In fact, I couldn't even afford the license to legally marry your Ma." "Pa!" the young man stammered, "do you know what that makes me?" "Yep," said the old man fingering the $50, "... and a cheap one, too.
Send this joke to a friend
2
Juggler, driving to his next performance, was stopped by the police. 'What are those knives doing in your car?' asked the officer. 'I juggle them in my act.' Oh yeah?' says the cop. 'Let's see you do it.' So the juggler starts tossing and juggling the knives. A guy driving by sees this and says, 'Wow, am I glad I quit drinking. Look at the test they're making you do now!'
Send this joke to a friend
3
Nuns at a church wanted to watch TV. The first one said she wanted to watch the INDY 500. The second one wanted to watch the sexy Shawn Michels on WWF. The third nun said she wanted to watch the knitting channel so she can knit some mittens for the kitchen. The fourth nun said she wanted to watch the discovery channel on how a baby is born. After some dicussion, they all decided to flip channels every 2 seconds so they can watch the same things. This is what is sounded like: And they're off! They're on top of each other! In...Out...In...Out...and yes, the baby is born!
Send this joke to a friend
4
What do you call a prostitute with her hand down her skirt? Self-employed
Send this joke to a friend
5
"Cash, check or charge?" I asked after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I notice a remote control for a television set in her purse. "Do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked. "No," she replied. "But my husband refused to come shopping with me, so I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him."
Send this joke to a friend
6
One doc operated on a person for a hernia. He opened his testis and took the balls out and kept it on the table. At the end of the operation he wanted to put his balls back into the pouch of testis. He searched operation theatre but could not find the balls of the patient. Lastly he told nurse to get two small onions from his lunch box as he cannot keep his testis pouch empty. After that operation he met the same patient in a garden for morning walk. Being a good doc, he asked his patient how he is feeling now. He said "Doc everything is fine, life is very cool except that whenever I scratch my balls, my eyes start watering."
Send this joke to a friend
7
BOSSES & TECHNOLOGY Boss: "My laptop computer is locked up. Can you help?" Dilbert: "Remember you have to hold it upside down and shake it to reboot." Boss: "Oh, that's right." Wally: "I wonder if he'll ever realise we gave him an "Etch-A-Sketch."
Send this joke to a friend
8
Two mates were screwing the same chick at the same time, and they were greeted with the sad news one day that their common squeeze had got knocked up. Having no way of knowing which was the father, the two mates chipped in and sent her out of town to have the little bastard. Several months passed without either of the mates hearing from the chick, so one of them decided to find her and get some news about the pregnancy. The next day, the other dude got a call from his mate. "I've got some good news and some bad news," the mate said on the telephone. "Well, give me the good news first," replied the other. "The good news is that she's fine, and she had twins," came the reply. "And the bad news?" "Mine died"
Send this joke to a friend
9
Women dream of world peace, a safe environment, and eliminating hunger. What do men dream of? Being stuck in a lift with the Spice girls.
Send this joke to a friend
10
| Today's Stories Today's Poems Today's Quotes |
| Jump to |