Today's quotes [1.6.21] Vote for the quote that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to quote categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your quote reading.
"Your lucky number is 3552664958674928. Watch for it everywhere." -- fortune
"Does anyone want to keep the rubber maid...?" -- Cathy Jenkins
For twenty-four years I've been in love with the same woman. If my wife ever finds out she'll kill me. -Henny Youngman
The plane was so fast that it took off from Los Angeles with two rabbits and landed in New York with two rabbits. -Joey Adams
I knew a tattoo artist whose wife left him because he had designs on other women. -Joey Adams
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