Today's poems [6.8.20]
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A horrid old lady of Summit,
Every time she got laid had to vomit,
And although she would groan
When her man got a bone,
"Give it here," she would say, "and I'll gum it!"
"Now really, young man, you're a bore,"
Said a Lady Priscilla van Blore.
"I'm covered with sweat
And you haven't come yet
And my God - it is quarter past four!"
There once was a woman from Niczes
Whose breasts were two different sizes
One it was small
It was nothing at all
The other was large and won prizes
Sent by karen
There was a young man of the Tweed
Who sucked his wife's arse thro' a reed.
When she had diarrhoea
He'd let none come near,
For fear they should poach on his feed.
There was an announcer named Herschel
Whose habits became controversial,
Because when out wooing
Whatever he was doing
At ten he'd insert his commercial.
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