Today's jokes [3.16.20]
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A Jesuit, a Dominican and a Franciscan were walking along an old road,
debating the greatness of their orders. Suddenly, an apparition of the
Holy Family appeared in front of them, with Jesus in a manger and Mary and
Joseph praying over him. The Franciscan fell on his face, over come with
awe at the of sight God born in such poverty. The Dominican fell to his
knees, Adoring the beautiful reflection of the Trinity and the Holy
Family. The Jesuit walked up to Joseph, put his arm around his shoulder,
and said, "So, where ya thinking of sending the kid for school?
Little Johnny had become a real nuisance while his father tried
to concentrate on his Saturday afternoon poker game with
friends and relatives. His father tried every way possible to get
Johnny to occupy himself...television, ice cream, homework,
video games...but the youngster insisted on running back and
forth behind the players and calling out the cards they held.
The other players became so annoyed that they threatened to
quit the game and all go home. At this point, the boy's uncle
stood up, took Johnny by the hand, and led him out of the
room. The uncle soon returned back to the poker table without
Johnny, and without comment the game resumed.
For the rest of the afternoon, little Johnny was nowhere to be
seen and the card players continued without any further
After the poker game ended, the father asked Johnny's uncle,
"What in the world did you say to Johnny? I haven't heard a
peep from him all day!"
"Not much," the boy's uncle replied. "I just showed him how to
A teacher said to her little student Suzy, "Punctuate the following
sentence: Fun fun fun worry worry worry."
Little Suzy thought for a moment and began her reply, "Let's see. Fun
period fun period fun no period worry worry worry!!!"
What is the meaning of "sanctity"?
It's french, for a lady with five breasts.
Sent by Darrell
A man went to the doctor's. The doctor came in and said,
"Well, I've got some good news and some bad news. The bad
news is that you have an inoperable brain tumor. The good
news is our hospital has just been certified to do brain
transplants and there has been an accident right out front
and a young couple was killed and you can have whichever
brain you'd like. The man's brain costs $100,000.00 and the
woman's brain costs "30,000.00."
The patient could not help but ask, "Why such a large
difference between the male and the female brain?"
The doctor replied, "The female brain is used."
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