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Today's jokes [2.8.20]

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What's the difference between men and women?

Women must play hard to get; men must get hard to play!

1. 




A man goes to a doctor and says:
"Doctor, it's embarassing, but every time I sneeze, I have an orgasm."
"Gee, what are you taking for it?"
"Snuff."

2. 




"Oh love, what did you ever do to deserve a wife like me?"
she said looking lovingly into her husbands eyes.
"I don't know, but I promise I'll never do it again."


3. 




This elderly woman passed a police van loading up the girls from a local 
brothel, and as she passed by, she asked one girl what the lineup was for. 
the girl shrugged and said, jokingly, "cough drops" and snickered.

Just then the cop approached the old gal and said, "What are you doing 
here, m'am?"

The woman pulled herself up to her full height oF 4'4 and replied, "Well, 
I can suck em can't I?" 

4. 




Q.  How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A.  Two.  But I have no idea how they get in there.

5. 



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