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Today's stories [8.11.18]

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The president turned back to his own role in history.
He told the audience that he saw a list of the top 100 news
stories of the century compiled by the Newseum, a journalism-
oriented museum ... across the Potomac in Virginia, and noticed
that "something about the events of the past year" [was] on it.

Clinton, smiling, revealed his number on the list: No. 53.

"No. 53! I mean, what does a guy have to do to make the top 50?
I came in six places after the invention of plastic, for crying
outloud. And I don't recall a year of 24-hour-a-day saturation
on the miracle of plastic."

               --Associated Press Report
                  on 85th White House Correspondents
                   Association Dinner
                    2 May 1999

1. 




An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech Support couldn't get her new 
Dell Computer to turn on. After ensuring the computer was plugged in, the 
technician asked her what happened when she pushed the power button. Her 
response, "I pushed and pushed on this foot pedal and nothing happens." 
The "foot pedal" turned out to be the computer's mouse.

2. 




Frequently, I get a strip of coupons or other promotional
items from a little printer at the checkout of my local grocery.

Coupons emerge as a thank-you for purchasing a product, or
based on some other derived data.

Yesterday, after buying a couple pints of Ben & Jerry's
Ice Cream (my favorite bad-for-me snack food), I got the
following checkout coupons in sequence: 

    Save 55c on Two(2) Pints Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream Free
    High Cholesterol Survival Guide 

3. 



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