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Today's poems [5.16.18]

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There was a young man from Racine
Who invented a fucking machine:
Both concave and convex,
It would fit either sex -
And could play with itself in between.

1. 




                    Most all husbands can testify
                            
                    To a wedding they cannot deny.
                            'Cause they know where and when
                            They got married, but then,
                            
                    What exactly escapes them is why.
                            


2. 




A proper young person named Gissing 
            Announced he had given up kissing. 
                "I strike out at once 
                For something that counts, 
            And besides my girl's front teeth are missing." 

3. 




               There was a young laundress of Lamas 
               Who invented high amorous dramas 
                    For the spots she espied 
                    Dried and hardened inside 
               The pants of the parson's pajamas. 

4. 




                    There was a young lad from Nahant
                            
                    Who was made like the Sensitive Plant.
                            When asked, "Do you fuck?"
                            He replied, "No such luck.
                            
                    I would if I could but I can't."
                            


5. 



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