Today's stories [4.5.18] Vote for the story that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to story categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your story reading.
IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: Too many deer were hit by cars and he no longer wanted them to cross there.
My wife used to have the habit of disbelieving something with the phrase "my ass!" She would say "Four hundred dollars, my ass!" or "30 minutes late, my ass!" One day a friend of mine and I were having a conversation, which she was listening to, and I said something like "...so it would be easy to penetrate.." She chimed in... "Penetrate my ass!" My friend and I laughed so long and hard we forgot what we were even talking about! Needless to say, she doesn't say "my ass!" any more.
IDIOTS AT THE AIRPORT I was at the airport, checking in at the gate, when the airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" I said, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled and nodded knowingly, "That's why we ask."
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