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Today's jokes [9.9.17]

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Why does a blonde have curtains on her PC?

To open windows

1. 




How do you know when your girlfriend is on anabolic steroids?

When she flips you over, holds you down and fucks you
.up the arse with her clitoris.


2. 




St. Peter meets Mother Theresa at the Gates Of Heaven and says, "You were 
a good woman. I'm giving you a nice halo."
Mother Theresa is walking around Heaven when she sees Princess Di, and the 
Princess has a much bigger halo.
Mother Theresa goes back to St. Peter and says, "St. Peter, I spent most 
of my adult life helping the poor and the sickly. Princess Di did no where 
near the amount of charitable work I did. Why does she have a bigger 
halo?"
St. Peter says, "That's not a halo. That's a steering wheel."

3. 




What is the definition of Agony?


                                         A one-armed man hanging off a cliff with itchy balls.

4. 




Question: What do you call a gay man's scrotum?

Answer: Mud flaps!

5. 



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