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Today's jokes [6.4.17]

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What is it called when a blonde blows in another blond's ear?

Data transfer. 

1. 




A middle-aged Jewish guy is out to dinner with his wife to celebrate her fortieth birthday. 
He says, "So what would you like, Julie? A Jaguar? A sable coat? A diamond necklace?"
She says, "Bernie, I want a divorce." He says, "I wasn't planning on spending that much."

2. 




What's the best way to make yourself last with your girlfriend?

Let everyone go first!

3. 




Why don't witches wear panties?

So they can get a better grip on the broom.

4. 




What is pink and moist and split in the middle?

A grapefruit!

5. 



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