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Today's poems [4.6.17]

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A worried young man from Stamboul
Discovered red spots on his tool.
Said the doctor, a cynic,
`Get out of my clinic!
Just wipe off the lipstick, you fool.'

1. 




As Apollo was chasing the fair 
               Daphne she vanished in air. 
                    He could find but a shrub 
                    With thick bark on the hub 
               And not even a knot-hole to spare. 

2. 




There was a young fellow named Malcolm 
            Who dusted his ass-hole with talcum. 
                He'd always use it 
                Everytime that he shit, 
            And found the sensation quite welcome. 

3. 




            A big bollocksed dancer, Durango, 
            Had trouble while dancing Fandango, 
                The blood from his twirls 
                Overfilled the guys pearls 
            Which swelled to the size of a mango. 

4. 




A farmer I know named O'Doole
Has a long and incredible tool.
He can use it to plow,
Or to diddle a cow,
Or just as a cue-stick at pool. 

5. 



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