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Today's jokes [11.8.17]

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Tombstone Epitaph:
Playing with names in a Ruidoso, New Mexico, cemetery:

Here lies
Johnny Yeast
Pardon me
For not rising

1. 




Sarah was a curious thirteen year old girl. "Mommy," she said, "I'd like 
you to answer one question." "Very good," replied her mother, "I was 
wondering when you would become curious about birds, flowers and bees." 
"It's not that," said the girl. "I know all about screwing. What I would 
like to know is how to make lasagna." 


2. 




A little girl asks her father, "where do little girls come from?" 
The father says, "they come from a hard-on." 
The little girl then asks her father, "where does a hard-on come from?" 
The father says, "little girls!" 

3. 




What do you get if you cross your missus with a pit bull?

Your very last headjob.


4. 




   Did any of you other married guys out there ever wonder whether it's
   better to have loved and lost, than to have loved and won ?


5. 



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