Today's quotes [7.5.14]
Vote for the quote that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes.
Also, links to quote categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your quote reading.
Never play peekaboo with a child on a long plane trip.
There's no end to the game. Finally I grabbed him by
the bib and said, "Look, it's always gonna be me!"
- Rita Rudner
"... hush my darling, be still my darling, the lion's on the phone..."
-- to the tune of "The lion sleeps tonight",
They Might Be Giants, "The Guitar"
"Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?"
- Mork, Mork and Mindy
Death is life's way of telling you you've been fired.
The New England Journal of Medicine reports that
9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot.
By voting you are helping select today's best quote. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best quotes to send in our daily best humor mailing.
Today's JokesToday's StoriesToday's PoemsToday's Funny Pic
S M T W Th F St
1 2 3 4 5
6 7 8 9 10 11 12
13 14 15 16 17 18 19
20 21 22 23 24 25 26
27 28 29 30 31