Today's quotes [7.26.14]
Vote for the quote that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes.
Also, links to quote categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your quote reading.
Some of the greatest writers this world has ever known have
written their finest works while happily and blissfully
drunk...and so shall I.
"I can fit the whole thing in my mouth, but I can't blow it while it's in
-- Sarah O'Brien, in reference to her pitch pipe
"The Hell Law says that Hell is reserved exclusively for them that
believe in it. Further, the lowest Rung in Hell is reserved for them that
believe in it on the supposition that they'll go there if they don't."
-- Honest Book of Truth; The Gospel According to
"A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke."
Don't worry, Homer. Nine out of ten religions fail in their first year.
-- God, ``Homer the Heretic''
By voting you are helping select today's best quote. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best quotes to send in our daily best humor mailing.
Today's JokesToday's StoriesToday's PoemsToday's Funny Pic
S M T W Th F St
1 2 3 4 5
6 7 8 9 10 11 12
13 14 15 16 17 18 19
20 21 22 23 24 25 26
27 28 29 30 31