Today's Jokes  |  Archives  |  Lists  |  Random  |  Register  |  RandJoke on Your Page  
 


Today's quotes [7.2.14]

Vote for the quote that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to quote categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your quote reading.


Men are like a fine wine.  They all start out like
grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they
mature into something with which you'd like to have dinner.

1. 




I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, "I'd like some fries."
   Thegirl at the counter said, "Would you like some fries with that?"
         Jay Leno


2. 




As your attorney, it is my duty to inform you that it is not important
   that you understand what I'm doing or why you're paying me so much
   money. What's important is that you continue to do so.
   -- Hunter S. Thompson's Samoan Attorney


3. 




"I'll moider da bum. " 
    - Heavyweight boxer Tony Galento, when asked what he
      thought of William Shakespeare 

4. 




"In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice.
 But, in practice, there is. " 
    - Jan L.A. van de Snepscheut 

5. 



BONUS! A random quote from Jokes2Go database
If you don't like it, just hit RELOAD





By voting you are helping select today's best quote. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best quotes to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read

Today's Jokes
Today's Stories
Today's Poems
Today's Funny Pic

 July '14 Quotes Issues:
S  M  T  W  Th F  St
      1  2  3  4  5  
6  7  8  9  10 11 12 
13 14 15 16 17 18 19 
20 21 22 23 24 25 26 
27 28 29 30 31 

Jump to  



For any questions or comments email us at info@jokes2go.com
Copyright© SpekGY, Inc, 1998-2016. All rights reserved.