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Today's stories [6.25.14]

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While waiting for the final voter recount in Florida, media services 
questioned the two major presidential candidates today. Both agreed that 
Americans are seeing too much inappropriate material in popular 
entertainment. However, they disagreed on the details.

The Republican candidate, George W. Bush, stated that there is too much 
bloody violence in the movies and on television.

Vice President Al Gore, his Democratic opponent, stated that the media 
presents Americans with too much sex and frontal nudity.

In other words, Bush says there is too much gore and Gore says there is 
too much bush.

1. 




According to a new study, Americans now spend 94% of their time indoors.
What do you expect from a culture that goes inside a gym to use a walking 
machine?

2. 




My brother was his graduating class's validictorian.

When he stood up to speak, all was going just fine, until he closed 
with, "and in closing I'll just say that there are two great honors a man 
can hope to achieve in his lifetime. And these two honors are, GET ON HER 
and STAY ON HER !"  The crowd busted a gut laughing, but my father was in 
big hot water since Mom knew exactly who had coached my brother with that 
one.  


Sent by Jennifer

3. 



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