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Today's poems [6.28.14]

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There was a Young Lady of Bute, 
Who played on a silver-gilf flute;
She played several jigs
To her uncle's white pigs,
That amusing Young Lady of Bute.


Seven wise men with knoweldge so fine,

Created a pussy to their design.

First was a butcher, smart and with,

Using a knife, he gave it a slit.

Second was a carpenter, strong and bold,

Using a hammer and chissel, he gave it a hole.

Third was a tailor, tall and thin,

With a piece of red velvet, he lines it within.

Fourth was a hunter, short and stout,

With a piece of fox fur, he lined it without.

Fifth was a fisherman nasty as hell,

He threw in a fish, and gave it a smell.

Next came a pretcher whose name was McGee,

Touched it and blessed it and said it could pee.

Last came a biker, dirty little nut,

Sucked it and fucked it and called it a cunt.

Sent by Christine


"Now really, young man, you're a bore,"
Said a Lady Priscilla van Blore.
"I'm covered with sweat
And you haven't come yet
And my God - it is quarter past four!"


There was an old man from Peru
Who dreamt he was eating his shoe.
He awoke in a fright 
In the middle of the night
And found it was perfectly true.


There once was a monk from Siberia
Whose manners were rather inferior
He did to a nun
What he shouldn't have done
And now she's a Mother Superior


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