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Today's jokes [6.14.14]

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Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach
   a four-way stop at the same time?

A: The pickup truck with the gun rack and the bumper
   sticker saying, "Guns don't kill people. I do."



1. 




Should you have any questions during the exam,
just raise your hand. This should cause enough
blood to flow to your brain to answer it yourself. 

2. 




A guy walks into a bar, orders a beer and says to the bartender, "Hey, I 
got this great Polish Joke..." 
The barkeep glares at him and says in a warning tone of voice: "Before you 
go telling that joke you better know that I'm Polish, both bouncers are 
Polish and so are most of my customers" 
"Okay" says the customer,"I'll tell it very slowly." 

3. 




A doctor, an engineer, and a politician were
arguing as to which profession was older.
     "Well," argued the doctor, "without a
physician mankind could not have survived, so I am
sure that mine is the oldest profession."
     "No," said the engineer, "before life began
there was complete chaos, and it took an engineer
to create some semblance of order from this chaos.
So engineering is older."
     "But," chirped the triumphant politician,
"who created the chaos?"

4. 




A man calls his wife and says to her, "Honey, I just got the chance of a
lifetime to go on a week-long fishing trip with my boss.  Could you pack
up my things so that they will be ready when I get home?" "Sure, honey," his
wife answers."Oh, and could you please pack my blue silk pyjamas?" "Sure,
honey," his wife answers again. The man comes home, picks up his things and
takes off for the week. He returns a week later, smiling.  His wife greets
him at the
front door. "So honey, how was your fishing trip?"
"It was great..." the husband answers. "But you forgot to pack my blue
silk pyjamas." "No I didn't," said his wife.  "They were in your tacklebox."

5. 



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