Today's quotes [5.5.14]
Vote for the quote that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes.
Also, links to quote categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your quote reading.
Last time I went to the movies I was thrown out for bringing my own food. My
argument was that the concession stand prices are outrageous. Besides, I
haven't had a Bar-B-Que in a long time.
I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.
"I've been working under operation code named duck and cover for so long now
I can neither confirm nor deny whether I can recall if I'm allowed to
confirm nor deny my own existance. Now does that make any sense to you?"
-- Bob the Psychopath, DAAS Kapital
Another sign seen at a swimming pool:
Welcome to our ool.
Notice there's no P in it.
Please keep it that way.
"MSDOS has to be one of the suckiest OSes ever."
"Umm... a small technical point. Messy-Dross is _not_ a true operating
system. It's a program loader with a hardon and delusions of grandeur."
-- Gary Barnes, Valdis Kletnieks
By voting you are helping select today's best quote. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best quotes to send in our daily best humor mailing.
Today's JokesToday's StoriesToday's PoemsToday's Funny Pic
S M T W Th F St
1 2 3
4 5 6 7 8 9 10
11 12 13 14 15 16 17
18 19 20 21 22 23 24
25 26 27 28 29 30 31