Today's jokes [5.11.14] Vote for the joke that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to joke categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your joke reading.
The wife of an older man is distraught because her husband's um... little sailor can't salute anymore. She goes to her local doctor and explains the situation and the doctor just feels plain bad for her. The doc thinks for a little bit, turns to the woman and says, "listen, I don't do this for everyone, but since your husband's on his way out...Get this prescription, and put three drops in his milk before he goes to bed." The wife is very happy and thanks the doc profusely. Two weeks later, the doctor sees the woman and asks how it went. The lady blushes, smiles and says, "well I put thirty drops in his milk by accident, and well, we just need an antidote now to close the coffin."
What do you call 2 blondes in the front seat of a car? Dual air bags!
Why do women have smaller feet than men? So they can stand closer to the kitchen sink.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? lick-a-lot-a-pus Sent by rob
Two nuns turn up at the fruit market and ask the veggie man for 120 cucumbers. The guy advises: "Sisters, if you buy 3 crates, that's 150, you'll get a 25% discount !" The nuns look at each other, and after a prolonged period of thinking one whispers to the other: "We could eat the 30, I suppose."
Love, Mary
PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.
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