Today's stories [4.8.14]
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A true story. A thermodynamics professor had written a take home exam
for his graduate students. It had one question:
"Is hell exothermic or endothermic? Support your answer with a
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law
or some variant. One student, however wrote the following:
First, we postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some
If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So, at what
rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I
think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it
will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for souls entering hell, lets look at the different religions that
exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you
are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell. Since, there
are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more
than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of
souls in hell to increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle's Law
states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay
the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay
So, if hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase
until all hell breaks loose.
Of course, if hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of
souls in hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until hell
It was not revealed what grade the student got.
[AP, Mammoth Lakes, CA] A San Anselmo man
died yesterday when he hit a lift tower at the
Mammoth mountain ski area while riding down the
slope on a foam pad, authorities said. Matthew
David Hubal, 22, was pronounced dead at Centinela
Mammoth Hospital. The accident occurred about 3
a.m. The Mono County Sheriff's Department said
Hubal and his friends had apparently hiked up a
ski run called Stump Alley and undid some yellow
foam protectors from the lift towers. Lieutenant
Mike Donnelly of the Mammoth Lakes Police
Department said the pads are used to protect
skiers who might hit the towers. The group
apparently used the pads to slide down the ski
slope and Hubal crashed into a tower. It has
since been investigated that the tower he hit was
the one with its pad removed.
[AP,St. Louis, MO] Robert Puelo, 32, was
apparently being disorderly in a St. Louis market.
When the clerk threatened to call police, Puelo
grabbed a hot dog, shoved it in his mouth, and
walked out without paying for it. Police later
found him unconscious in front of the store:
paramedics removed the six-inch wiener from his
throat, Where it had choked him to death.
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