Today's stories [4.24.14]
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Those German controllers at Frankfurt Airport tend to be a
short-tempered lot. They not only expect pilots to know their
parking location but how to get there without any assistance.
So it was with some amusement that we (PanAm 747) listened
to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground and a
British Airways 747 (radio call Speedbird 206) after landing.
Speedbird 206: "Good morning Frankfurt. Speedbird 206 clear
Ground: "Good Morning. Taxi to your gate."
The British Airways 747 pulls onto the main taxiway and stops.
Ground: "Speedbird, do you know where you are going?"
Speedbird 206: "Stand by, ground. I'm looking up the gate
Ground (impatiently): "Speedbird 206, have you never flown to
Speedbird 206 (coolly), "Yes, in 1944. But I didn't stop."
I pulled into a town I couldn't believe still
existed in 1999.
A dusty, dirt road, a little old wooden store that
actually said "General Store", and that was it.
There was a little old man sitting in front of the
store in a rocking chair. I said to him, "What do
you folks do around here?"
He said, "We don't do nothin' but hunt n' fuck."
I said, "What do you hunt?"
He said, "Somethin' to fuck."
Tech Support: "OK Bob, let's press the control and escape
keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the
middle of the screen. Now type the letter 'P' to bring up
the Program Manager."
Customer: "I don't have a 'P'."
Tech Support: "On your keyboard, Bob."
Customer: "What do you mean?"
Tech Support: "'P' on your keyboard, Bob."
Customer: "I'm not going to do that!"
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