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Today's poems [4.11.14]

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There was a young singer named Springer, 
               Got his testicles caught in a wringer. 
                    He hollered in pain 
                    As they rolled down the drain, 
               (falsetto): "There goes my career as a singer!" 

1. 




               A bobby of Nottingham Junction 
               Whose organ had long ceased to function 
                    Deceived his good wife 
                    For the rest of her life 
               With the aid of a constable's truncheon. 

2. 




               There was a young man from Aberdeen 
               Who invented a jerking machine. 
                    On the twenty-fifth stroke 
                    The goddamn thing broke 
               And beat his balls into a cream. 
                                                  

3. 




               There once was a girl from Anheuser, 
               Who said no man could suprise her, 
                    But Pabst took a chance, 
                    Found a Schlitz down her pants, 
               And now he is sadder Budweiser. 

4. 




               There was a young fellow of Perth 
               Whose balls were the finest on earth. 
                    They grew to such size 
                    That one won a prize, 
               And goodness knows what they were worth. 

5. 



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