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Today's jokes [4.17.14]

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A guy starts talking to two women in a bar, they turn
out to be Siamese twins, and they wind up back at his
He makes love to one, and then starts to work on the
other. He realizes that the first one might get bored
watching, so he her asks what she'd like to do. 
She says, "Is that a trombone in the corner? I'd love
to play your trombone." 
So she plays it while he screws her sister. 
A few weeks later, the girls are walking past the guy's
apartment building. One of the girls says, "Let's stop
up and see that guy." 
The other girl says, " you think he'd remember us?" 


When is it OK for a lady to slap a midget? 

When they are slow dancing and he tells her how nice her hair smells. 


Little Johnny was sitting on the bench in the park.
Suzie comes along chomping on her bubblegum. 
Suzie asked, "You wanna play doctor?" 
Johnny replied, "NO, that too old fashioned.
Spit out you gum, I wanna play president."


"The Seven Dwarfs were all in bed feeling Happy-then he got out of bed
so they felt Grumpy instead....."


A state trooper pulled a car over and told the man driving
that he was going 50 mph in a 40 mph zone.
"I was only going 40!" the driver protested.
"Not according to my radar," the trooper said.
"Yes, I was!" the man shouted back.
"No you weren't!" the trooper said.
With that, the man's wife leaned toward the window and said,
'Officer, I should warn you not to argue with my husband when
he's been drinking." 


BONUS! A random joke from Jokes2Go database
If you don't like it, just hit RELOAD

Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.


PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.

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