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Today's jokes [4.1.14]

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   A few moments after the daughter announced her engagement, her Father
   asked, "Does this fellow have any money ?"
   
   The daughter shook her head sadly. "Oh Daddy ! You men are all alike."
   sighing deeply, she replied, "That's exactly what he asked me about
   you."


1. 




A blonde and a brunette are living together. The brunette came home from 
work one day and the blonde had a rope around her waist. The brunette 
asked why the rope was around her waist. The blonde said that she was 
trying to commit suicide. The brunette said, "You put it around your 
neck!" The blonde replied, "I tried that but I couldn't breathe!"

2. 




Whats a blonde's favorite surgery?

A Slipodictomy.

3. 




Father Goose Story No. 2



        When the powerful king found his throne missing the next
day, he  ordered HIS army to kidnap the other king's count and force
him to tell where the throne was being hid. The session went as
follows:

king:   Where is the throne?
count:  I cannot tell you.
king:   Then I will have you killed!  Executioner, cut off his
        head!
count:  (as the axe is swinging down...)
        Ok!  I will tell you!
                        THWACK!!!

Moral: don't hatchet your counts before they chicken.

4. 




At the first session of a conversion class the
minister conducting the class asked, "What must
we do before we can expect forgiveness from sin?" 

After a long silence, one of the men in attendance
raised his hand and said: 

"Sin?"

5. 



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Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.

Love,
Mary

PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.



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