Today's poems [3.28.14]
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Said a lovely young lady named Lake,
Pervertedly fond of a snake,
"If my good friend, the boa,
What offspring we'll leave in our wake!"
Another young lady would make
Advances to snake after snake.
Though men she had met
Got her diaphragm wet,
She wanted her glottis to shake.
There was a young man named Zerubbabel
Who had only one real, and one rubber ball.
When they asked if his pleasure
Was only half measure,
He replied, "That is highly improbable."
Vendor's 12 Days of Christmas
On the 12th day of Christmas my vendor gave to me:
12 days to set up
10 more megahertz
9 brand new standards
8 more megs of RAM
7 minor upgrades
6 hidden features
5 tons of docs
4 new API's
3 more months of waiting
2 more SCSI drives
And a bug fix for Windows NT.
(c) 1993 The Bill Gates of Hell Society
MY SPELL CHECKER
I have a spell checker
It came with my PC
It plane lee marks four my revue
Miss steaks aye can knot see
Eye ran this poem threw it
Your sure real glad two no
Its very polished in its own weigh
My chequer tolled me sew
A cheek or is a blessing
It freeze yew lodes of thyme
It helps me right awl stiles two reed
And aides me when aye rime
Now spilling does not phase me
It does knot bring a tier
My pay purrs awl due glad den
With wrapped words fare as hear
To rite with care is quite a feet
Of witch won should be proud
And wee mussed dew the best wee can
Sew flaws are knot aloud
So ewe can sea why aye dew prays
Such soft wear four pea seas
And why eye brake in two averse
Buy righting want to please
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