Today's poems [3.13.14]
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In Kansas there lived a young monk
Who often was in a blue funk,
For his come always froze
On the sisters' thick hose,
And they never would part with a chunk.
There once were two ladies from Birmingham
That dealy with matters not concerning them.
They reached under the robes
And tickled the globes
Of the bishop that then was confirming them
Now this bishop he wasn't a fool,
He knew what to do with that duel.
He whipped off his britches
And gave those two bitches
A foot of episcople tool.
A habit uncouth and unsav'ry,
Kept the Bishop of Essex in slav'ry,
Midst shrieks, hoots, and howls,
He'd bugger large owls,
Which he kept in an underground av'ry.
"Last night," said a lassie named Ruth,
"In a long-distance telephone booth,
I enjoyed the perfection
Of an ideal connection---
I was screwed, if you must know the truth."
There was a young man in Hong Kong
Who grew seven fathoms of prong.
It looked, when erect,
About as you'd expect---
When coiled it did not seem so long.
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