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Today's stories [1.24.14]

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I once worked as a contractor in another state, and another 
girl on the team, also a contractor from quite a distance 
away, was constantly ratting out other members of the team 
to the boss, and was snippy and always overreacted to any 
kind of language or inference to any sort of sexual topic.  
She was constantly offended at our frequent joke-telling.
One Friday she was going to drive home - several states 
away -  for the weekend.  Before she left, I stuck a bumper 
sticker on the roof of her car (she was short so couldn't see it 
up there) and the sticker said "I LIKE TO ---- TRUCKERS.  
HONK IF YOU WANT ME TO PULL OVER"  (the blank wasn't 
blank on the sticker). I can only guess what kind of a ride 
home she had.  If she ever even GOT there....


Sent by Jennifer

1. 




Another flight Attendant's comment on a less than perfect
landing: "We ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo 
bounces us to the terminal."


2. 




As the plane landed and was coming to a stop at Washington National, a
lone voice comes over the loudspeaker: "Whoa, big fella...WHOA..!"

3. 



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This guy was playing a game of texas holdem poker and had already lost 300 dollars when suddenly he looked down, and just next to the table he sees a little green leprechaun.
"Jus quit playing poker right now and I will give you a million dollars worth in a pot full of gold said the little green gentlemen.
The player replied, sure "just Let me get even first."


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