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Today's jokes [9.15.13]

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Little Red Riding Hood is skipping down the road when she sees the Big
Bad Wolf crouched down behind a log. 
 
"My what big eyes you have, Mr Wolf", says Little Red Riding Hood. 

The wolf jumps up and runs away. Further down the road Little Red
Riding Hood sees the wolf again. This time he is crouched behind a tree
stump. 
 
"My what big ears you have, Mr Wolf", says Little Red Riding Hood. 

Again the wolf jumps up and runs away. Some distance further down the
track Little Red Riding Hood again encounters the Big Bad Wolf, this time
crouched behind a road sign. 

"My what big teeth you have, Mr Wolf", taunts Little Red Riding Hood. 

With that the Big Bad Wolf jumps up and screams... "Will you fuck off,
I'm trying to take a shit !"

1. 




Q: How do you know a blonde has just lost her virginity?
            A: Her crayons are still sticky.

2. 




Do you know the difference in sugar and Sweet-n-Low?
Sugar is when you kiss her on the lips! 

3. 




What's the definition of a Jewish nyphomaniac?

     One that screws when she's just had her hair done. 

4. 




John : I don't know what to buy - a cow or a bicycle.
Peter : You will look silly riding a cow.
John : I will look even sillier trying to milk a bicycle.

5. 



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Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.

Love,
Mary

PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.



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