Today's Jokes  |  Archives  |  Lists  |  Random  |  Register  |  RandJoke on Your Page  

Today's jokes [8.23.13]

Vote for the joke that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to joke categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your joke reading.

A businessman was having a tough time lugging his lumpy, oversized travel
bag onto the plane.  Helped by a flight attendant, he finally managed to
stuff it in the overhead bin.  "Do you always carry such heavy luggage?" 
she sighed.
"No more," the man said.  "Next time, I'm riding in the bag, and my 
partner can buy the ticket!"


One day a boy and his father were at the dining room table
working on the boy's Social Studies homework, the chapter
about government. The boy turns to his father and asks,
"Dad, how many people work in the U.S. government?"
The father replies without hesitating, "Oh, about ten percent."


   Three mice are sitting in a bar talking about how tough they are. The
   first mouse slams
   down a shot and says, "I play with mouse traps for fun. I'll run into
   one on purpose and as
   it's closing on me, I grab the bar and bench press it twenty or thirty
   times." And with that
   he slams another shot.
   The second mouse slams down a shot and says, "That's nothing. I take
   those Decon
   tablets, cut 'em up, and snort 'em just for the fun of it." And with
   that he slams another
   The third mouse slams down a shot, gets up and walks away. The first
   two mice look at
   each other, and then turn to the third mouse and ask, "Where the hell
   are you going?"
   The third mouse stops and replies, "I'm going home to fuck the cat."


Q: What do you call a 6.9?
A: A great sex position fucked up by a period!


I've got trouble with the wife again - she came into the bar 
looking for me and I asked for her number.


BONUS! A random joke from Jokes2Go database
If you don't like it, just hit RELOAD

Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.


PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.

By voting you are helping select today's best joke. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best jokes to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read

Today's Stories
Today's Poems
Today's Quotes
Today's Funny Pic

 August '13 Jokes Issues:
S  M  T  W  Th F  St
            1  2  3  
4  5  6  7  8  9  10 
11 12 13 14 15 16 17 
18 19 20 21 22 23 24 
25 26 27 28 29 30 31 

Jump to  

For any questions or comments email us at
Copyright© SpekGY, Inc, 1998-2016. All rights reserved.