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Today's jokes [6.30.13]

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   A new medical study has shown that a woman's breast-feeding isn't
   adversely affected by
   aerobics. It was found, however, to be pretty distracting to guys in
   the class.
   


1. 




On his way out of church, Frank stopped at the door to speak to the 
minister. "Would it be right," he asked, "for a person to profit
from the mistakes of another?" 
"Absolutely not!" replied the pastor. 
"In that case," said the young man, "I wonder if you'd consider
returning the hundred dollars I paid you to marry my wife and me
last July." 

2. 




Two cows were talking in the field one day.

First Cow: Have you heard about the Mad Cow disease that's going around?
Second Cow: Yeah, makes you glad you're a penguin, doesn't it? 

3. 




What's the difference between an Italian mother and a Jewish mother?

An Italian mother says, "If you don't eat it, I'll kill you."
A Jewish mother says, "If you don't eat it, I'll kill myself."

4. 




A man suspected his wife of seeing another man.
So, he hired a famous Chinese detective,
Ram Pam Sim Wimm, to watch and report any
activities that might develop.  A few days later,
he received this report:

  Most honorable sir:
  You leave house.
  He come house.
  I watch.
  He and she leave house.
  I follow.
  He and she get on train.
  I follow.
  He and she go in hotel.
  I climb tree-look in window.
  He kiss she.
  She kiss he.
  He strip she.
  She strip he.
  He play with she.
  She play with he.
  I play with me.
  Fall out of tree, not see.
  No Fee.

Sent by Marina

5. 



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Dear John, I'm sorry I broke off our engagement. I miss you terribly and regret my decision. Please take me back.

Love,
Mary

PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.



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