Today's stories [5.9.13] Vote for the story that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to story categories and "Email Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your story reading.
Before we were married Wife used to always say, "You're only interested in one thing." Trouble is now though, after 36 years, I've forgotten what the hell it was.
After a long, bumpy flight, our passengers were glad to finally land. They disembarked, and the other attendants and I checked for items left behind. In a seat pocket, I found a bag of home-made cookies with a note saying "Much love, Mom." Quickly, I gave the bag to our gate agent in hopes it would be reunited with its owner. In few minutes, this announcement came over the public- address system in the concourse: "Would the passenger who lost his cookies on Flight 502, please return to the gate?"
Ladies Night Out. So ... the other day, three friends and I went to this "Ladies Night Club." One of the girls wanted to impress us, so she pulls out a $10 bill. The "dancer" came over to us, and my friend licked the $10 and put it on his butt cheek. Not to be outdone, my second friend pulls out a $20 bill. She calls the guy back over, licks the $20 bill and puts it on his other butt cheek. Still attempting to impress the rest of us, my third friend pulls out a $50 bill. She calls the guy back over again, licks the $50 bill and again puts it on one of his butt cheeks. Now the attention is focused on me. What could I do to top that? I got out my wallet, thought for a minute ... and then the financial analyst in me took over. I got out my ATM card, swiped it down the crack of his ass, grabbed the $80 bucks and went home. Sent by Neicey
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