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Today's quotes [5.26.13]

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My VCR flashes 01:35, 01:35, 01:35, ...


"If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?"

Art Hoppe.


Calkin's Law of Menu Language
The number of adjectives and verbs that are added to the description of a
menu item is in inverse proportion to the quality of the dish.


He who says there is no such thing as an honest man, you may be sure is himself a knave. 

                                                        --Bishop Berkeley


A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory


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