Today's poems [5.17.13]

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When she wanted a new way to futter 
               He greased her behind with butter; 
                    Then, with a sock, 
                    In went his jock, 
               And they carried her home on a shutter. 

There was a young lady of Spain 
               Whose face was excessively plain 
                    But her cunt had a pucker 
                    That made the men fuck'er 
               Again and again and again. 

There once was a young man from Virtualand, 
               Who traded real life for a wedding band, 
                    He signed onto the net, 
                    His betrothed got upset, 
               And she lopped off his link @ the ampersand. 

Alas for a preacher named Hoke, 
            Whose shit was all stuck in his poke. 
                He farted a blast 
                That left hearers aghast, 
            But nothing emerged but some smoke. 

While Titian was mixing rose-madder,
His model posed nude on a ladder.
Her position, to Titian,
Suggested coition,
So he climbed up the ladder and had 'er.

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