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Today's stories [4.1.13]

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A LITTLE-KNOWN CHRISTMAS FACT:


One particular Christmas season a long time ago, Santa was 

getting ready for his annual trip ... but there were problems

everywhere.

	      

Four of his elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not

produce the toys as fast as the regular ones so Santa was beginning to

feel the pressure of being behind schedule. 

Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her mom was coming to visit.

	     

This stressed Santa even more. When he went to harness the

reindeer,  he found that three of them were about to give

birth and two had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where.

More stress.

	 

Then when he began to load the sleigh one of the boards cracked and

the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the toys. 

So, frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup of coffee and a shot  of whiskey. When he

went to the cupboard, he discovered that the elves had hid the liquor

and there was nothing to drink. 

In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the coffee pot and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all

over the kitchen floor.

	      

He went to get the broom and found that mice had eaten the

straw it was made from. Just then the doorbell rang and Santa cussed

on his way to the door. He opened the door and there was a little

angel with a great big Christmas tree.

	      

The angel said, very cheerfully, "Merry Christmas Santa.

Isn't it just a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Isn't

it just a  lovely tree?

	 

Where would you like me to stick it?"

	      

Thus began the tradition of the little angel on top of the

Christmas tree.


Sent by Neicey


1. 




Ukraine man crashes car as 50 pagers ring at once

January 14, 1999

KIEV, Ukraine (Reuters) -- A Ukraine businessman who bought a pager for
each member of his staff as a New Year gift was so alarmed when all 50 of
them went off at the same time that he drove his car into a lamp post, a
newspaper said on Thursday.

The unnamed businessman was returning from the pager shop when the accident
happened, the Fakty daily reported.

"With no more than 100 meters to go to the office, the 50 pagers on the
back seat suddenly burst out screeching. The businessman's fright was such
that he simply let go of the steering wheel and the the car ploughed into a
lamp post."

After he had assessed the damage to the car, the businessman turned his
attention to the message on the 50 pagers. It read: "Congratulations on a
successful purchase!

2. 




Norreen did a "Self-Judi" when meeting a business partner of
her husband.  She was asked if she came from a large family.
"I said, no, the men are only about six feet tall and pretty thin."



3. 



BONUS! A random story from Jokes2Go database
If you don't like it, just hit RELOAD




This guy was playing a game of texas holdem poker and had already lost 300 dollars when suddenly he looked down, and just next to the table he sees a little green leprechaun.
"Jus quit playing poker right now and I will give you a million dollars worth in a pot full of gold said the little green gentlemen.
The player replied, sure "just Let me get even first."


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