Today's jokes [4.23.13]
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What do you call rabbits marching backwards?
A receding hare line.........
She was so blond, she thought Boys II Men was a daycare center.
If Britney Spears and Fat Bastard mated, the resulting child would be:
Anna Nicole Smith.
Sent by Marisa
A blonde began a job as an Junior school counselor, and she
was eager to help. One day during break she noticed a boy
standing by himself on the side of a playing field while the
rest of the kids enjoyed a game of football at the other.
Sandy approached and asked if he was alright.
The boy said he was. A little while later, however, Sandy
noticed the boy was in the same spot, still by himself.
Approaching again, Sandy said, "Would you like me to be
your friend?" The boy hesitated, then said, "Okay", looking
at the woman suspiciously. Feeling she was making progress,
Sandy then asked "Why are you standing here all alone?
Why don't you go and join those boys playing football over
there?" "Because," the little boy said with great exasperation,
"I'm the bloody goalie."
Sent by Gerald
A man wonders if having sex on the Sabbath is a sin because
he is not sure if sex is work or play. So he goes to a priest
and asks for his opinion on this question. After consulting the
Bible, the priest says, "My son, after an exhaustive search, I
am positive that sex is work and is therefore not permitted
on Sundays." The man thinks: "What does a priest know
about sex?" So he goes to a minister who, after all, is a
married man and experienced in this matter. He queries the
minister and receives the same reply. Sex is work and
therefore not for the Sabbath! Not pleased with the reply, he
seeks out a Rabbi, a man of thousands of years tradition
and knowledge. The Rabbi ponders the question, then
states, "My son, sex is definitely play." The man
replies, "Rabbi, how can you be so sure when so many others
tell me sex is work?" The Rabbi softly speaks, "My son, if sex
were work, my wife would have the maid do it."
Sent by Jesse
PS. Congratulations on winning the World Series of Poker Main Event.
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